I know. There are no words. It was fantastic. Although I contemplated that the above video could potentially be the highlight of my trip, I decided to give NC a chance to impress me and finished my drive to Maren and Kevin:
They have been dating for about a year and pretty quickly after I landed, Maren announced they were engaged. I have hung around these two before and wasn't surprised when Maren announced their upcoming nuptials. I was quite happy about the announcement given how much time they spend kissing and spanking each other. Truth be told, they are romantically disgusting pretty much constantly. Since celibacy is pretty awful, it will be good for them to finally put their sexual energy to good use, wear themselves out, and become normal and productive members of society again. Here's the happy couple in one of their many smooch fests:
Besides watching the North Carolina lovebirds, I also tried North Carolina boiled peanuts:
They are everywhere down there. At the gas stations as depicted in the above pic, at sporting events, at all the farmer's markets... It's like pizza strips in Rhode Island but instead of a delicious pizza strip, you get boiled peanuts. I first ate them about a year ago when my sister cooked some up. I thought they were grody then but figured it was my sister's failing. I was wrong. It's a failing of the peanut. Sorry southerners, peanuts just weren't meant to be eaten this way. Boiling them makes them hot, soggy, and ensures they will taste like the shell you cooked them in. I don't know if you have heard of roasted and salted peanuts or honey roasted peanuts, but they are much better than the horrible idea y'all had to boil them. Heck, if you want a soft peanut, try my favorite preparation: peanut butter! Leave this peanut nonsense to the experts and use boiling water for something tasty... like mashed potatoes...
North Carolina had something else that was everywhere...
Yep, waterfalls. And did you like that I tapped that lady in purple on the head? She didn't seem to care but I had a great time bugging her. I saw about 7 really great falls and could have seen about 20 more in the small area I was in if I wanted to hike any more than I already had. Which I didn't... which is why I only saw 7... I also got to see a really cool cavern that was wet as could be. So wet in fact, I didn't dare take out my camera for fear of water damage from all the moisture dripping off the cave ceiling.
I also roasted weenies and s'mores around Maren and Kevin's firepit, but forgot to take pictures. It's probably because I've sat around a million fires in my day and forgot how unusual that probably is for most people. We made Caramelo S'mores out of some candy bars I had in the back of my car and man were they delicious!
I also went to a Baptist church the Sunday I was there. Maren said sometimes they had a banjo player that sang hymns. He didn't end up showing which I thought was false advertising on Maren's part, but the rest of the meeting was quite interesting. I wanted to take pictures since I enjoyed myself immensely, but felt like I should probably be respectful on the Sabbath Day. The preacher yelled a lot, flung spittle at least a mile, and played the piano to accompany all the prayers that were said. There was also some random dude in the congregation that played the tambourine along with the 10 million hymns that were sung. It was pure perfection. I don't have any desire to convert, but I quite like Baptists and would invite them anywhere, especially if I could count on a banjo or tambourine coming with them!
I had a few other adventures but have no more pictures to prove myself with. However, I can say that I like you North Carolina. You're no Ocean State, but I've visited twice and would definitely come back... Even if I do have to wade through stupid boiled peanuts to talk to you...
