Cool Refreshment

Recently, I stumbled upon an invention that I have oogled for many years, but have never gotten around to buying for myself...

That my friends is a 64 ounce insulated soda mug.  When I finally decided to plunge into such a commitment, I had the option to downsize my habit to a more reasonable 32 ounce size.  However, let's get real.  32 ounces is essentially a sip of soda to me so I know I'd be spending way too much time and money refilling that sucker.  Besides, I'm budget conscious and when I can refill a 64 ounce soda for the same price as a 32 ounce soda...  Well, you do the math. 

I found the mug on a day that was 90+ degrees and high humidity.  I had been working in my yard and was so hot and thirsty, but couldn't seem to get my thirst quenched because my ice maker couldn't keep up with all of the ice we'd been using that day, and thus, had been empty for hours.  Plus, the water out of my tap is not that cold in the summer, so it just seemed to compound my problem.  I felt so desperate at one point, I seriously considered just sucking on my arm to make good use of all the sweat that refuses to dry out here when it's humid.  However, I came to my senses and rode to my favorite watering hole to see if their ice and Diet Dr. Pepper could finally bust my thirst.  When I arrived, they had run out of ice too,which for a split second, made me panic.  Just as I was turning around to strangle the dude at the cash register for the lack of ice, I spied the afore mentioned mug!  I bought one for Jared, one for me, then bought a bag of ice to fill them with and bingo!  I was back in business.

I drained my 64 ounces of Diet DP by the time we had driven home, so I set my mug by my bed to sip on the water melting off the remaining ice...  WHICH BARELY MELTED ALL NIGHT LONG BECAUSE IT'S INSULATED!  When I realized how fantastic my giant mug was, I began texting and calling all my friends and family to share the good news.  A few of my loved ones pretended to care.  A few tried to tell me that I had a very bad habit.  I of course ignored them and am now looking for more tolerant friends to replace them with.  My daughter Kayley was somewhat rude about my new treasure.  I think she's holding a grudge because of this:

Hannah and I may have lied for two days about how I purchased a yellow Barracuda when Kayley moved out.  We told her I have lots more money now that she's not sucking my teats anymore, so decided to buy the one car she wishes she could have.  I showed her the above picture to prove that it had happened, but she totally accused me of photoshopping the pic and then started copping an attitude about my mug.  To punish her for her insolent behavior, I began to send lots of pics and texts about how happy I was drinking out of my mug.  At one point, I took one of me drinking out of Jared's mug which I didn't know was filled with ice water:

I was so disgusted, I had to hurry and wash out the ice water in my mouth with Diet Dr. Pepper so as not to upset my delicate balance.  In my haste to cleanse myself, I forgot to send my annoying pic to Kayley!  I did manage to perform a scientific experiment on Kayley's behalf quite by accident the next day.  The accident came about because I didn't want to haul my giant addiction into work with me since I don't want my patients to think they can go around drinking soda like an idiot!  To be a good example, I decided to leave the mug in my truck in 90 degree humid weather for 3 hours while I did the afternoon clinic.  When I came out, my drink was still cold and my ice had barely melted!  I immediately broadcasted the miracle to Jared and the girls, but not only were Hannah and Kayley not impressed, Hannah openly mocked me!  Later that night, I took my lover to see The Who in concert, but decided to leave my mug home because I didn't want anyone to steal it.  While I was having my eardrums blasted out of my skull at the concert, Hannah sent threatening texts about my mug along with this:

She hijacked my mug and no amount of distant verbal abuse got her to leave it alone!  I wanted to stay mad and even tried to hold a grudge, but my awesome new mug still had ice in it when I got back from the concert.  Whatever Kayley and Hannah.  Be rude if you want.  I don't need friends because I have a giant insulated soda mug.  In fact, I could really use a soda right now.  Think I'll hop in my car and go get one...

Sayanora Shoog

Kayley, my eldest baby, left for home yesterday.  As in her home.  In Idaho.  Because she's 18 and doesn't live with her mommy anymore.  In some ways, I'm grateful it took so long to sell my house in Idaho because I've gotten used to not living with her anymore.  I told Jared when we dropped her off at the airport that I wondered if that's why I didn't feel booby about seeing her go.  He said it was possible, but that he thought the real reason I wasn't emotional was because we had raised her right and that she's ready to live on her own.  Whatever the reason for my lack of tears, I actually do really like Kayley and have appreciated the relationship I have with her.  Over the course of the last year, I began to think of her as my friend, and I miss her now that she's gone.

What did we do on our last day together?  Well, Kayley had to check in for her flight first thing in the morning on Sunday.  How early?  Well look at this conversation I had with Jared about it:

Her early flight was a direct consequence of my endless cheapness.  That early hour saved me 300 bucks, but man did it suck getting up at 4:30 to drop her off...  More on that later...  After I forced Kayley to wake up early to check in for her flight, I forced all of my kids to go to church yesterday, then forced them to go see a "gorge" that sits between Rhode Island and Massachusetts.  It was essentially a part of the Blackstone River and was supposed to have a waterfall that used to power the mills that were once a huge part of the economy in Rhode Island and Massachusetts.  It certainly did not meet my vision of what I think a gorge should look like given that I come from the West.  The "waterfall" also left much to be desired considering that I come from Idaho and we have a fair number of decent waterfalls around the Gem State...  Just look at this example from Jared's last trip to Shoshone Falls with my girls before he left for Rhode Island.  You can't see the height, but baby, that whitewater should tell you how high and fast that water was running over the falls:

Although the gorge and falls were small, like all of New England, it was lovely, and the lack of "gorgeness" and "waterfallness" meant the walking we did was non-strenuous and pleasant.  Here's me being inappropriate in front of the falls:

And my girls being sweet in front of the "waterfall."

If you are wondering why I only have four girls in the picture, it's because Hannah was in one of her moods.  Because it was my last day with Kayley, I think the heavens smiled upon me and blessed me with a picture of Hannah's elusive pout.  It's VERY difficult to catch on film, so I was thrilled when I actually captured it in all of its glory:

I know.  She's precious.  I wanted to drag them to go look at the only covered bridge in Rhode Island, but Kayley had lost her wallet the day before (and my credit card though I didn't know it until later) so we needed to head home to find it so she could actually board the plane the next day.  Thankfully, Kayley managed to find it at Target when we got back from the falls and I said a silent thanks to heaven for the wallet's safe return.  It would have been nice to keep her in Rhode Island a few more weeks while we had a new driver's license mailed, but Kayley moving on was necessary too.

We had a nice dinner together, then I spent the evening kicking myself for being so damn cheap again, because when I set the alarm to wake up at 4:30 AM the next morning, it made me physically sick.  How did I do when the alarm actually went off?  Pretty great because I totally went to the airport AND physically went inside to watch Kayley go through security in my pajamas.  My pajamas consist of some sweat pants and a night shirt that goes to my knees with the following astrological sign:

Just as a side note, I am not a Gemini, but my mom inherited that nightshirt from someone and I inherited it from her.  To make myself extra classy, I did not tuck in the nightshirt during the airport trip and I also did not wear a bra.  You are welcome.  Here's what Kayley wore to the airport:

And here's a pic of her going through security...  Which she hated...

I hated it for her and though she expressed some disdain about the whole thing, I warned her to behave respectfully even though I never do at airports.  I reminded her that I am actually surprised I have never been arrested and so cautioned her to behave.  Thankfully, she listened and managed to board her flight just fine.  My idiot brother picked her up in Salt Lake City and it sounds like she's settled back into her old life without her mommy just fine. 

18 years flies by fast people.  I raised one whole baby and she's pretty amazing.  Don't forget about me Kayley.  I'm the loud and obnoxious woman that did a lot of nice things for you while you were growing up.  My name is Rachel.  Call me sometime?