I'm Your Only Mummy

Jared and I have some pretty strict rules as far as movie standards go in that we have made our girls wait until the day they turn 13 to watch PG-13 flicks.  Occasionally, the older girls have broken that rule and if they watched something scary, I could count on them wanting to sleep with me for weeks, and they could count on me having no sympathy for them.

I have wanted to avoid the lazy trap with my younger kids - you know - when the mom and dad get worn out being enforcers on the last few spawn so their youngest kids run around like axe murders and develop nasty meth habits?  Unfortunately, it really does get exhausting being an enforcer and sometimes I feel pretty lax even though I've only been in the mom business 16 years.  Therefore, when the kids all wanted to watch The Mummy a few Sundays ago, I didn't have the energy or desire to say no.

The Karma I have endured for slacking on my enforcer role has been awful!  My four year old baby, Bub was scared witless by that stupid show!  She won't go down into the basement alone anymore.  This poses a real problem because I don't bring clean laundry up to drawers until it's nearly time to start filling the baskets back up with dirties.  Judge all you want, but I detest laundry.  The natural consequence for my hatred of laundry is that my kiddos have to travel two flights for skivvies.  I just found out today that Bub has been stealing undies from her older sisters in an attempt to avoid the basement.  Here she is after lily caught her red handed and after I told her to run down for her shorts because for the 100th time:  MUMMIES ARE NOT ALIVE!!!

The worst part is I can't get upset with anyone but myself; she's only four and I let her watch the freaking Mummy!  We had to send someone down with her to help her get her clothes because the little freak is terrified!  I tried asking Jared why this is such a big deal.  That movie is totally not scary.  He gave me a condescending look and reminded me that I'm forty.

I'm not sure how much longer the basement strike will continue but this is my official apology to the universe.  I get it!  I screwed up!  No more PG-13 movies  for the little ones for a few more years!  Now can we stop the insanity please?  I really don't want to be pushed into bringing my laundry upstairs until I'm damn good and ready...Even if I have single handedly traumatized my baby with a fake movie mummy!