Sarah and Kareena Made Me Post This...

Fresh off my trip to North Carolina, I got to fly home and visit my lover and babies.  It was only a weekend trip, but it's becoming more difficult to come home and even more agonizing to leave.  Everything is packed, all of my paint choices have been covered in neutrals, and this year without my garden or my bees, it's just not my home anymore.  It's a weird feeling living in limbo and I'm convinced the separation is going to last forever.

I Snapchatted my travels both to see Maren in NC and to my family in Idaho to pass the time.  Some memories were fun, like this vid of my hike to Chimney Rock:

Or how about this cool natural waterslide called Sliding Rock?

Other memories were pitiful.  Like this Snap of my family as they watched me go through security on my flight back to Rhode Island:

I snapped this through tears after trying to figure out a way to hold on to Jared and the girls forever.  It didn't work because I'm back in Providence alone.  I wish I could say I'm handling this well but I'm not.  I feel abandoned by God, I feel utterly alone, and even the lobster I ate last payday barely brought me any joy.  The only bright spot on the horizon is a conference I'm attending in Atlanta that Jared managed to get time off for.  Remember my post about retirement and my countdown to the big event?  Yup.  I set one up for the Atlanta trip and named it "Booty Call," since that's what my relationship with my spouse has been reduced to.  Here's the screenshot as proof:

Gosh he's sexy...  You know what?  I'm suddenly feeling better.  I only have about six weeks before I get to touch that hunk in person.  You're right.  I live a blessed life after all...