The Ravages of War

Bubba had an accident yesterday.

She was showering, slipped on the shower floor, and whacked her head on the bottom shower track.  The huge amount of blood flowing from that head wound turned my other four babies into sniveling, sobbing, idiots who ran around screaming like chickens with their heads cut off.  I had to tell Lily and Bub specifically to get it together - that this was going to be fine.  I just couldn't take the boobing!

Of course I knew the gash would need some closure, most likely staples.  Since I don't carry around a vagina repair kit, off to the Community Care we went.  The wait would have been far more intolerable if there hadn't been a huge family there discussing the benefit of using magnets to heal all manner of health problems.  One of the lead instigators of the conversation even stood up to demonstrate for the others how to apply the magnet, sticking the two ends of his necklace behind his ears and letting it "pull" him around the room.  I might have been more open to his interpretation of this western medicine alternative if he wasn't standing there with a Dum Dum sucker clenched in his teeth - one of about 20 suckers each member of the family had fisted out of the basket on the front desk!  Manners people, manners.  I digress...  Here Bub and I are, halfway through our two hour wait:

And fast-forward to the four staples she took like a boss...

She got a box of ice cream sandwiches for taking her lumps like a man.  I figured all the accident drama was over for a while - until I heard a weird noise downstairs this morning.  I called Lily up to investigate, only to find out she was pretending that her leg had been blown off in war.

Emma was helping her limp around I guess.  Here's their improvisation from the back side:

That's her foot tucked up in her pants!  What?!  Does anyone else think this is weird?!  Weirder still, Bub was in the thick of the war story with them.  You just cracked your skull open for real, but you'll role play mass destruction and maiming of others?!  I gotta have these freaks commited.  Anyone know a good shrink?