Today, as everyone knows, was Easter. I love this time of year with the rebirth of my plants and the new seedlings I grow in my basement in preparation for my garden. I love the promise of new life all around as everyone both human and animal seems to be working on growing new babies. As a christian, I profoundly appreciate the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ as it relates to my eternal salvation and was glad for the spiritual messages shared with me this day. Unfortunately, it can be hard to be a christian while also enjoying the many pagan rituals that surround us on Easter. My family usually gets together and it inevitably becomes a circus. I was worried that perhaps Easter would be less than epic this year because my youngest brother was AWOL in California. However, it ended up being pretty great even in his absence.
First, only three of my sisters, my parents, and my family got together. Despite the relatively low sibling turnout, look at all the ratty kids around the table decorating eggs.
The din was deafening as usual and I enjoyed watching the little idiots get their pagan artistry on. The highlight of the festivities was the egg my niece Marina created. May I point out that she belongs to my sister Jeta who refuses to read my blog because she is worried she may discover something offensive. When I found this egg I wanted to call her up and tell her that no matter what creepy little plans she may have for my niece, she is genetically programmed to be a jerk like the rest of us...
I would have been perfectly happy if this was the only exciting thing that happened today, but lo and behold, the Easter Bunny was riding around on a bike in tennis shoes. He tried to drive around the corner from my parents, but my loud and intimidating voice beckoned him back to the front of the yard. I have no idea who this guy was, but he gave treats out to the spawn running around in my mom's house.
The best part of all? My sweet mom ran out to fill up his basket so that he could spread more pagan joy to the predominantly christian children who roam the streets of Rigby, Idaho.
And no, my mother had no idea who this joker was either, she was just so excited to be helpful. She loves kids and any excuse she has to brighten their miserable little lives is a bandwagon she gladly jumps on! The final treat of the day were these lovely lighted eggs my mom found somewhere.
They sat on the coffee table all day minding their own pagan business until I suddenly had a stroke of genius:
I know. I really do. Someone told me once that I am Klassy with a K while someone else asked if I could touch my elbow with my tongue. It had to do with a compromising picture I took with my spouse on my daughter's IPod. Thankfully, I have no shame so who cares if it surfaces someday... Actually, I think it already got posted on Facebook. Look it up folks. As if this idea wasn't great enough, my sweet mom (remember the little darling filling up the Easter Bunny's basket)? She wondered why I had missed a spot with my lighted joy. She took the next pic...
Random guy dressed as a bunny riding a bike through neighbor filled with kids luring them to him with candy? I know what that is, a creeper! Hide yo kids and hide yo wife! How's your ma gonna feel when she learns she aided the creep in his creepiness? Sick! I hope your kids were accounted for before, during, and after he left.
ReplyDeleteBTW the lights are a nice touch. It's like an airport runway dude who waves the lights to tell/show the plane where to go.