Pass Me That Cookie Percy

I'm no slouch when it comes to baking cookies.  In fact, aside from my supreme gift of annoying others, cookie baking might just be my only other talent.  Because of my gut, which some Spanish speakers lovingly call a "panza," I rarely bake for my family.  I just can't have that kind of temptation hanging around my pad.  I only bake for others... Lots of others.  I have purchased loyalty, kindness, and offers to murder someone if the need should arise... all with my cookies.

Since my children take cold lunch to school, I spend more money than my own baking would cost me so they can have a treat in their lunches.  What do I pack?  Why crap.  Crap I would never eat:  cheap snack cakes, unfrosted animal cookies, even plain crackers, but never my sublime cookies.

Today in Sam's Club, they were having a sale on their knockoff of Chips Ahoy cookies - 56 of them to be exact.  Chips Ahoy are quite possibly the WORST store bought dessert in my opinion, but I purchased them anyway:

They were disgusting but cheap and I knew they wouldn't tempt me as they sat in my cupboard waiting to be packed in lunches.  There was something so disturbing about buying these.  Mostly I think it bugs me because I feel so sorry for folks who don't know what a delicious homemade cookie tastes like, let alone how to bake one.  

I brought them home and felt just a bit disappointed when my kids thought a box of pure gold was now nestled on the shelf.  Are they just used to the disgusting fare I buy them?  Have they accepted their sad fate since they realize begging for a fresh cookie is futile?  Do they actually like cheap trash?  I almost threw a fit about their palates until I recalled what happens when cookies start to bake in my oven; my kids appear out of thin air, begging for both dough and the perfect pieces of heaven once they finish baking... Yep, they've probably just accepted their fate. Poor babies...